Diary .. Entry 1

My mind has drifted off while my life took over

My heart has been pulled away from writing, I guess you need to be in the right state of mind .

This is my diary… The one I share with all the people who know.

 

I was in my bed, sharing it with you.

I tried to wake you up, touching your arm..tummy.. chest.. But all you did was hold my hands together so they wouldn’t move… “I can’t sleep”… I said softly…

 

 

 

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The scary thing about love

I’m almost positive that when you read this, you might feel the same.

 

It all started with a morning conversation about kissing. we laughed, there were questions, and then you told me you were in love with me.

My heart was pulsing so much I could hardly concentrate on the meeting I was in. Finally the one I adored, was in love with me..

Days and weeks went by, happy, like never before.

And one sad day I woke up realizing that something big happened and I wasn’t even aware of it all.

I regret ever asking you about it

Because it all went down in flames

I cried, you cried

And then you told me you couldn’t do it anymore, not the way we are use to be together.

Now

I listen to the voice notes you sent me, saying… Baby.. I.. Really love you

And it plays over and over in my head and in my heart, because I’m still there and you’re nowhere to be found

 

And now…

Even in the briefest of moments I get glimmers of who we use to be

The love we shared, the happiness

 

And now…

I’m left behind

Because there’s so many things waiting for you

While I just sat, waiting for you

 

Because..

There has never been anyone else for me, you were the first, you’ll be the last

 

A heart can only scar that many times

And I won’t beg to be hurt, yet another day

 

Love..

The girl you left behind.